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www.tolkien.rs • Pogledaj temu - Najvece Gluposti I Idiotizmi Igraca

Najvece Gluposti I Idiotizmi Igraca

AD&D, D&D 3e... najpoznatiji frp sistemi

Moderatori: High Duke, Marko Pravedni

 Re: Najvece Gluposti I Idiotizmi Igraca

Postod Hama u Čet Feb 07, 2008 2:26 pm

Ajde bachi....
Lets go! Heroes for a day, Legends forever!!!

Postoje dve vrste ljudi sa kojima nemam mnogo zajednickog...one koji ne znaju engleski i one koji ne znaju da rade na kompjuterima...

Ne postoji evolucija, postoje samo zivotinje koje se Hami nisu dopale...

http://www.improbableisland.com/home.php?r=Predrag
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Postovi: 4636
Pridružio se: Sub Dec 21, 2002 1:02 pm
Lokacija: Beograd

 Re: Najvece Gluposti I Idiotizmi Igraca

Postod Lorkind u Pet Feb 08, 2008 9:54 pm

evo kao post
Famous Last Words

0001-"Let's go in."

0002-"Let's not go in."

0003-"I follow them."

0004-"I stab the dragon and tell it to get off me."

0005-"I drink the bottle marked POISON on the off-chance that it's the extra-healing potion."

0006-"I kill it."

0007-"Let me handle this."

0008-"Whaddya mean, a pentagram only has FIVE sides?"

0009-"What a useless scroll. It just says, HASTUR HASTUR HASTUR over and over again..."

0010-"Click?? ...This doesn't come with ammo?"

0011-"Why is your torch flame turning blue?"

0012-"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH"

0013-"Trust me."

0014-"I never get lost."

0015-(A corridor ahead is full of brown mold)
"I cast Fireball down the hall, then send my fire elemental to investigate."

0016-"Dammit, this thing won't die!"

0017-a)"I bet without Mjolnir you're a real wuss."
b)"He looks like a wuss to me."

0018-"He hit me for HOW MUCH?????"

0019-"They're only kobolds!"

0020-"Hey, this chest just bit me!"

0021-"I try to move silently in plate armor..."

0022-"I didn't find any traps !!"

0023-"Wonder what this button does ?"

0024-"Don't worry, he is probably just first level."

0025-"This 250' wall has so many holes, it should be easy to climb."

0026-"I'll just close my eyes and walk up to the dracolisk holding up my mirror"

0027-"Can I eat this green slime?"

0028-"I'll just walk up to the dragon invisibly"

0029-"Why is this man speaking in sign language?"

0030-"This type of undead can't drain levels"

0031-"I'll open the door, sneak up on him from behind and backstab him!"

0032-"We are in luck! The dragon is sleeping"

0033-"That's only a statue"

0034-"There is no trap on the door, so let's open it"

0035-"Look, behind you!!!" Said by a gnome(pc) to an ogre as a disliked parttymember crept up.
End of the other member.

0036-"I have this dungeon at home, I know where everything is!"

0037-"Don't worry, the DM won't hose me"

0038-"We'll untie the prisoners and lock them in the closet."

0039-"Why can't we take Clarissa (Disguised evil high priestess) with us?"

0040-"How much will you give me for this idol I found (cursed)?"

0041-"I'm not powerful enough, can't you just give me second level."

0042-"Don't I get the farie fire bonus on my parry."

0043-Star Wars:"Stormtroopers can't hit a Wampa at this dist..."

0044-Traveller:"Who took the battery out of my grav belt?"

0045-"They're wearing blue robes? They must be Druids. Roll for initiative, suckers."
(At which point the polymorphed Bone Devils ate him.)

0046-"I see HOW MANY wights?!" (from the crypts of Ravenloft)

0047-"Don't worry, wyvern don't attack unless they're provoked."

0048-"You watch the door, I'll take out the Gas Spore (Beholder) that's guarding the treasure."

0049-"A Nightmare, huh? I'll attack for one round and prepare to run."

0050-"I'll take off my armor so I'm silent and slip past the dragon."

0051-"They need a twenty to hit me, I'm invincible"

0052-"Don't worry sir, we can handle it."

0053-"You jump down and distract him, and I'll shoot him."

0054-NPC: "Lets drop our weapons and talk."
PC : "Okay!"

0055-"We killed all monsters on this level."

0056-"I've been here before. There are no traps in this section."

0057-"What do you mean 18 meter long crocodile--you just said crocodile."

0058-"Well ...., I'll touch it again"

0059-"I attempt to disbelive."

0060-"I cast a fireball" (into a 10'x10'x10' room)

0061-"I know if I draw a card I'll get the VOID."

0062-GM:"You're very lucky, you all don't know how lucky you are! Save or take 210 points of damage"

0063-GM:"You don't get your +5 for being a dwarf, because it's special bodak power"

0064-" It's OK, I trust her..." ... *BOOM!!!!!!*

0065-"Stand back you wimps. I'll kill it."

0066-"Oops."

0067-"OK! I moon the Balrog!"

0068-"My first arrow MISSED the magic-user pointing at me?? OK, I shoot again!"

0069-"Where'd that thief go now?"

0070-"Trap? What trap?"

0071-"So what?"

0072-"Don't be silly. If this was really the ship's "Self-Destruct Button", do you think they'd leave
it lying around where anyone could press it?"

0073-"Hmmm...the sign on the door says, "AIRLOCK". I wonder what's inside."

0074-"You're all a bunch of wimps!! I'll prove to you myself that an entire orc stronghold is no match
for your average barbarian."

0075-"All right, we're in an unexplored dungeon in total darkness with no light sources or infravision...
Hey, I know!! Let's yell and scream a lot so we can locate each other by sound!!"

0076-"I'm going to kill our captives anyway, and I don't give a damn
whether the other goody-good PC's like it or not."

0077-"Y'know, since our druid's been so obnoxious, it would probably
serve him right if we set his precious forest on fire."

0078-"A clever bluff, Agent N42, but not clever enough. You see, right
away I recognized your `pistol' as a cleverly disguised
cigarette lighter."

0079-"A creature with two BABOON heads on a scaly REPTILIAN body? With
TENTACLES for arms? Hunh. Must be some stupid wizard's magical
construct. Let's kill it."

0080-"Yes, it's true I humiliated the DM in front of the debating team
Wednesday, but he's much too broad-minded to take it out on my
character."

0081-"OK, O Mighty Odin, as long as you're not gonna answer my prayers,
I'm gonna tell ya what I REALLY think of ya!"

0082-"I drop trough and expose myself to the arch-mage as a gesture
of contempt."

0083-"Well, guys, I'm sorry my activities in the last town got us all
tarred and feathered, but you're not going to hold that against me,
are you?"

0084-"No, I'm sure there's some stipulation that says a disintegrate spell
won't work if the spellcaster casts it on himself. Here, I'll
prove it."

0085-"Oops, I spilled flaming oil on my beard. I'd better wash it off
after we kill this fire lizard."

0086-"Well, we know he's LAWFUL evil, so he should keep his word when he
promised not to betray us."

0087-"So I'm safely across the pit? Whew! For a minute there I was
worried that you might remember my encumbrance penalties."

0088-"Well, as long as I've stumbled into Princess Savitra's bedroom, I
might as well try to seduce her."

0089-"Thank God!! A hobgoblin camp up ahead! Maybe they can help heal
our wounded!"

0090-"Don't worry! The chances of me blowing a climb walls roll twice,
at my level, are infinitesimal."

0091-"All right, I jump...Now on the way down, I activate my ring of
feather fall...no, wait, didn't I lend it to Jim?"

0092-"So you're Tiamat, huh? Are you evil? Yes? Would you like
to convert?"

0093-"I cast a `gate' spell and gate in the Iraqi Air Force."

0094-"Well, *I* trust our party thief, and if he says this door isn't
trapped, that's good enough for me."

0095-"Well, I didn't much like this character, anyway...Here goes
nothing..."


0096-"I swing the Toxic Avenger's mop at the grenade so I can bat it
across the room at the aliens...Wait! Isn't that grenade
Contact Fused ???"

0097-"All right, I guess Toronaga's right. There can't possibly be
anything on the other side of this airlock. Why not open the
damned thing."

0098-"Whistling sounds? Naw, they can't have a grenade launcher!"

0099-"Okay, there's nothing guarding the bridge. I go through the door
and find the helm."

0100-"They can't possibly outflank us. We have a multi-scanner!"

0101-"Come on! Arrows versus Kevlar?"

0102-"What do you mean Tsu Han's pilotting the shuttle? Does he even
have Insystem Pilot? WHY ARE YOU SMILING AND SHAKING YOUR HEAD?"

0103-"So that giant fell into the pit? I'll jump over it and get
his treasure."

0104-"Oh, that sorceress looked a little pale when she examined the
mirror which has the pentagram in front of it on the floor. I
think I'll break the mirror."

0105-"It's not trapped, you just want it to yourself."{He still got it
for himself.}

0106-"Me first Me first."

0107-"Dinosaur? Hey, no problem, right Balinor?"

0108-"You call yourself a barbarian, you son of a witch ?"

0109-To powerful demon: "Try me sh*t breath!"

0110-To sleeping dragon: "Oops, sorry...didn't mean to disturb you."

0111-"Come on, we haven't found any so far."

0112-Ranger: "What do I see?"
DM:"Do you remember the trap that killed Indy's guide in Raiders
of the Lost Ark?"

0113-"Diamonds ... Gold... Saphires !!! Terry! Terry, we're rich, we're
rich, we're fabulously wealthy !!!! ...Terry ..... Terry ??"

0114-"Let's walk this way."

0115-"Hey folks, follow me, I remember the way to the dungeon exit."

0116-"I never get to have any fun!"

0117-"You mean they get to use the critical hit chart too?"

0118-"Hey, I know a dragon when I see one."

0119-"What do you mean the whole room we're in detects as a trap?"

0120-"Hey you! Frost Giant! How's the weather up there?"

0121-"Just watch, I bet I get the one item that's cursed."

0122-"What does it mean when you botch an initiative roll?"

0123-"Don't worry. I know what I'm doing!"

0124-"Stop!"

0125-"A sign labeled `pit'? I walk up to it."

0126-"No problem. That's easy!"

0127-"Hey, I found it. I'm keeping it."

0128-"I think we'll have to reason with him."

0129-"Hah! I'm not dead yet. I still have five hit points."

0130-"Oh, no. We're being rescued. How embarrassing!"

0131-"Yeah, I know it's dangerous, but think of the experience
points."

0132-"I stand right underneath the Fire Giant and point my wand
straight up."

0133-"Don't worry. I've got a plan."

0134-"They can't see me. I'm invisible!"

0135-"I wonder what's in here?"

0136-"He wouldn't try that trick again!"

0137-"My two mutations? ...But I've only one!"

0138-"Just because you're a dragon doesn't mean you can push ME
around."

0139-"They don't look so tough."

0140-"I'm SURE there are no traps."

0141-GM: "FIVE...FOUR...THREE...TWO..."
PC: "I look for the light switch."

0142-"What do you mean trolls regenerate!?!"

0143-"Here kitty, kitty, kitty..."

0144-"I'll open it."

0145-"It seems easy enough"

0146-"I think he can be trusted."

0147-"Those noises are probably nothing."

0148-"I'll pull the lever."

0149-"Money!"

0150-"Magic is for wimps."

0151-"Oh. He'll miss. Just look at my AC."

0152-"Oh no! Let's go help them!"

0153-"Run away!"

0154-"I want to kill something."

0155-"All clear, guys."

0156-"Gummy werebears? They should be cake to kill once they turn
human."

0157-"Wait a minute, didn't the old man say something about a curse?"

0158-"Hey, where'd all the big spiders come from?"

0159-"Okay, Ed, your underwear explodes!"

0160-"Bob, you have any grenades left? Throw me one..."

0161-"AGAIN!?!?!"

0162-"He shot out my eye? Okay, I tear out my other eye and throw it
at him as a gesture of defiance."

0163-"I pull the metal ring out of the sphere."(Recognize a Holy
Hand Grenade?)

0164-"This is a push-over dungeon."

0165-a)"Maybe this wasn't such a good idea."
b)"I told him it was a bad idea."

0166-"I'll use my taunt skill."

0167-"Your mother was a Gully Dwarf."

0168-"My God will protect me."

0169-"You wouldn't dare!"

0170-"Hey, we're out! We're safe!"

0171-"I'll try it on."

0172-"C'mon! We're a team!"

0173-"You don't look like a mage!"

0174-"It'd be stupid to trap this!"

0175-"I'll kick the door in!"

0176-"It could be dangerous!"

0177-"Here, hold this rope while I go down."

0178-a)"I thought you brought the food!"
b)"I thought you brought the antidote!"

0179-"Well, if you didn't belch, who did?"

0180-"Isn't there anything exciting in this dungeon?" (said to GM)

0181-"Uh guys? Hello? Anyone?"

0182-"Dragons give you a lot of Exp."

0183-"I know an illusion when I see one."

0184-"Who's the bitch with the spiders?" (ahhh! the infamous Lloth)

0185-"I sit on the pale lady with the funny teeth." (Ahhh! the
infamous vampire)

0186-"Mysterious shadows in the room? I'm not scared --- you can't
spook me!"

0187-"There's a smell of gas, huh? Well, my lantern is hooded. It ought
to be safe."

0188-"Take off my armor and try to swim? Forget it --- I worked hard
to get this +3 plate mail. Besides, the DM never lets anyone
die --- he wouldn't let me drown, would he?"

0189-"I cast a lightning bolt at the ochre jelly."

0190-"Lightning bolts don't ricochet off stone walls, do they?"

0191-"A ballista? What's that? How many dice of damage does it do?"
{Twenty.It's like a crossbow, only MUCH larger.}

0192-"So what if he calls the guard? A backwater town like this can't
have a very big militia."

0193-"Only six inches long? Ha... Wait, you don't mean six _scale_ inches,
do you?" {said in miniature-figures-game. Character itself
was 3/4" high.}

0194-"...and then I... Uh, guys? Why are looking at me like that? Guys?"
{After using a spell called "Polymorph Other" }

0195-"What do you mean, `It doesn't work' ?" {Item with no more
charges left.}

0196-"Oh these, I've fought them before..."

0197-"Then I'll hit him back!" {spoken at the start of a bar brawl.}

0198-"I'm bored..."

0199-"Quick! What did that scroll say ?"

0200-"How did he dissappear like that ?" {About a hostile warrior with
a ring of invisibility and two attacks per round.}

0201-"I'll try to pick his pockets." {Pockets belonged to a level
30 mage.}

0202-"Maybe we should just kill him."

0203-"Read it to me." {It was a fireball scroll.}

0204-"You mean there's more ?" {About undeads which entered the room}

0205-"MAGIC ITEMS!"

0206-"He looks like a sunburnt elf? Huh."

0207-"I'll light a fire." (In the woods at night (attracted bears)}

0208-"You'd have to be a GOD to smile after that hit!"


0209-GM:"You DID take the swimming skill?" (to a player when character
fell overboard.)

0210-"I'll stand guard." (Didn't want to enter orc cave.Orcs were out.
Orcs came back.)

0211-"What do you mean I hear water?" {in a tunnel}


0212-"I bar the door!" {Door opened inward.}

0213-"I'll cover you!"

0214-"Take out a Beholder's eyes, and Bingo!"

0215-"I can't possibly miss..."

0216-"Don't worry, I can hit him! I can hit him!"

0217-"Shut up, bird!" {to a parrot who happened to be repeating the
True Name of a demon which subsequently exterminated the party}

0218-"But he has to be our friend!"

0219-"How would you like to have this sword?"

0220-NPC:"Take this ring as a token of my esteem." {This party no longer
accepts gifts from unknown NPC's.}

0221-PLAYER:"BEGONE THINGS OF EVIL!!!" REPLY:"Begone thing of good."

0222-"I go through the door... Wait, I check for traps!"

0223-"Don't be silly. That kind of monster NEVER follows you."

0224-"I run up to the monster, throw my magic net over it, and try to
take the jewel from around its neck." {But nets don't stop
creatures from biting.}

0225-"Hmmm... odd-colored walls. Well, I touch one." {turned to stone}

0226-"I wonder what the black-and-yellow striped ring above the seat does?"
{ Ejection Seat. No atmosphere and no vacc-suit.}

0227-"What do you mean, vacc-suit proficiency? I thought it was perfectly
straightforward, like wearing clothes..."
[From a character attempting to fight hand-to-hand in one.]

0228-"But the directions SAID to `pull pin and throw' !"
[From a beautifully role-played traveller character from a non-
technological world. He was given a scout ship survival pack,
which among other gimcracks, contained concussion grenades.
When he got in trouble, of course, he pulled the pin out of
one and threw it ("it" being the pin, naturally)...]

0229-"Uh, what does 'explosive decompression' mean?"

0230-"Why the hell do you always put `Graf' before your name? Is that
this backward planet's equivalent of `Duke' or something?"

0231-"Don't worry - I have Pilot-7."

0232-"What do you mean `energy weapons are illegal' ?"

0233-"DO NOT OPEN"

0234-"Easy kill."

0235-"I've got you now!"

0236-"Is this one really able to breath fire?"

0237-"Trust me. I know what I'm doing"

0238-"I open the door and see who it is." {in response to a knock on
the door}

0239-"I jump off the roof - He won't get my last HP then."

0240-"Oh cute! Look at the fuzzy little cubs!"

0241-"Your armor is too noisy. Wait here and I'll scout ahead."

0242-"I explain to the ogre that it was an honest mistake."

0243-"Oh, he puts those in all of his dungeons. It's a gas spore."

0244-"Hubba hubba! The nymph's taking off her clothes!"

0245-"Whoever did this must be long gone by now."

0246-"Easy, boy. What's this stupid horse's problem?"

0247-"You mean ... this ... is the last ... torch?"

0248-"Oh don't worry. The poisonous ones have orange stripes."

0249-"I really didn't know it was against the law."

0250-"You racist! They're elves. So what if they're black?"

0251-"This flickering torch light is playing tricks on my eyes.
It almost seemed as though that chest moved by itself."

0252-"Demogorgon."

0253-"What's the duration of this Fly spell?"

0254-"I don't understand. It should be dead by now."

0255-"Finally! I thought that troll would never die."

0256-"If we look brave and fearless, they won't attack."

0257-"I'de feel better if we had some crampons. Oh, what the hell,
let's go for it."

0258-"I wouldn't worry about the thieves' guild -- they don't have a
clue who did it."

0259-"Aha! So you're the [killer/spy/vampire]!"

0260-"It doesn't look very fast; we can easily swim across."

0261-"While they're fighting the dragon, I sneak around behind him and
examine his hoard."

0262-"I wish we had a 10 foot pole. Oh well."

0263-"Ha ha ha! Let's put bookworms in his spell research library."

0264-"I rolled a 20. How could that be a miss?"

0265-"I've got plenty of spells; I don't need to carry a weapon."

0266-"I'm heir to the crown. They wouldn't dare!"

0267-"Don't you understand? The odds will be even. If we can't see them,
they can't see us."

0268-"Who's bringing up the rear?"

0269-"It's only one wight. The others are just ghouls."

0270-"But [longbows/match locks/nuclear weapons] haven't been invented
yet..."

0271-"Look, I don't care what you think of her, or her "demonic smile."
She's hot to trot. So, if you'll excuse us..."

0272-"I've got better things to do than run your petty errands, your
highness."

0273-"What?! I thought you said fifTEEN kobolds."

0274-"It'll be a short ocean voyage. One week's worth of food and water
will be enough."

0275-"I won't fall in; I just want a better look at what's down there."

0276-"Ochre jelly? Ok, everyone, break out the bread and the peanut
butter."

0277-"Quit clowning around. Look, whichever one of you is doing that,
it's not funny."

0278-"Hey! Where's my components?"

0279-"For some reason I had always imagined that bugbears were somewhat
smaller."

0280-"A trap? That's exactly what we're supposed to expect. I think this
DM is more imaginative than that."

0281-"After what we took, he won't be able to afford an assassin."

0282-"They're usually not aggressive. If we leave it alone, it'll leave us
alone."

0283-"Wanna see my new spell?"

0284-"Something's wrong with my d20."

0285-"That was no healing potion! I'm gonna kill that swindler!"

0286-"Ha! That's the oldest trick in the book."

0287-"Hey, Bill, cast a Detect Invisibility, quick. Bill. Bill? Where's Bill?"

0288-"Cover me."

0289-"I think it's asleep."

0290-"Look at the size of those tracks!"

0291-"Can you make out this next rune? It looks like someone spilled coffee on
this scroll."

0292-"..23..24..Well, that's the last of his arrows."

0293-"Watch this."

0294-"Well, if I remember correctly, it's AC 7, 3+1 HD, 1d8 damage. Hmm..."

"I should defeat him around the 4th round and still have
about 12.5 hit points left. Ok, let's rock!"

0295-"No problem! I'll just cast a ... whoops, I forgot. I'm just 2nd level,
aren't I?"

0296-"Did you see that guy's head? I wonder what did this."

0297-"Damned be him who first cries, 'Hold, enough!'"

0298-"If you cut me down, I will only become more powerful."

0299-"Zoinks! I sure hope that's just Scooby behind me."

0300-"I ain't afraid of no ghost."

0301-"Geez, I'm kind of low on funds. Ok, I'll take 500 gp for the healing
potion."

0302-"I bet it's just an illusion."

0303-"Well, at least I tried...?"

0304-"It's only an illusionary red dragon!"

0305-"I'll attempt to patch it up." {...finding a hole in the cargo bay of the
the orbital shuttle}

0306-"I'll cut the red wire."

0307-"Hey, I'll try to hide in shadows." {Room full of Shadows(kind of monster
in AD&D)}

0308-a)"I cast a powerball." {inside an elevator}
b)"I shoot him with my laser." {inside a crowded elevator}

0309-"I cast a hellblast." {at a gas station}

0310-"Let's blow open the airlock."

0311-"I jump from our car into theirs."

0312-"YOU are the UGLIEST guy I've ever seen." {to an 8 foot tall troll}

0313-"What do you mean 'the bullets are just bouncing off'!"

0314-"O.K. pal, take your best shot."

0315-"Let's rush them."

0316-"There's no way they'll ever find us."

0317-"What could possibly go wrong?"

0318-"Him? What is HE doing here? I thought we killed him!"

0319-"I throw a grenade at them." {in the middle of a weapons storhouse}

0320-"Guys, I'm out of ammo."

0321-"I tackle her." {She was a wolf shapeshifter in human form}

0322-"Dragon? What dragon?"

0323-"I shoot a missile at one of the Wasps."

0324-"Does anybody in the group have Doc Wagon?"

0325-"A juggernaught? What the hell's a juggernaught?"

0326-"Get him!"

0327-"I give him the finger..."

0328-"He has a threat rating of WHAT ?"

0329-"Guys, there's some giant bugs in the hallway."

0330-"Do you think it's a toxic spirit?"

0331-"What's with that wierdo with the teeth?"

0332-"I put my AK97 under my coat and go to the subway."

0333-"How many teeth does it have?" {character used to make chains of the
teeth of his dead opponents}

0334-"'Brak'? That's a stupid name for a barbarian!"

0335-"Blue, no...wait, Yellow! Aaaaarghhhh" {to a bridgekeeper}

0336-"Shit, it's a minefield, leggit !!!"

0337-"Call me Kregor the Undying!"

0338-"Let's split."

0339-"They will flee in terror from my "

0340-"Feel like surrendering ?"

0341-"Give you my T.O.&E ?! Figure it out yourself..."

0342-"It's only infantry."

0343- while rolling dices "Please God, not an ammo explosion..."

0344-"Stupid fool. Tried to scare me by firing LRMs at my feet. I charge
right at him." {character standing in a minefield}

0345-"Sure you can use the LRM Carrier platoon in this scenario ."

0346-"Airstrike? Sure.....But I get one too."

0347-"I'll hide my ship near the planet's ring?" {which is where several hundred
nuclear missile-equipped automated battlesats were hidden}

0348-"That's an interesting headband you're wearing pilot Smith."
{kamikaze headband}

0349-"I'm sure reinforcements will get here on time. They promised."

0350-"Say, what's that red dot on your forehead?" {laser sight}

evo prvih giant, then a fire giant, and after that, a clouds
giant. There can't be Storm giant, it'll be too obvious, Ok, the exit
is there, i feel it, let's not rest, and move on..."

1218-"You killed all my friends ! Prepare to face my ... FUMBLE!!!!"

1219-"Let's follow the trail!"

1220-"He couldn't possibly have any spell left!"

1221-"That dragon is too young to breathe fire."

1222-"Don't worry- the dragon has used all of it's breath waepons for today!"

1223-"Awe, look at the cute little fuzzy thing!"

1224-"Don't worry, we can out run it!"

1225-"Why are those two triangles on the ground like that?" {pentagram}

1226-"Hey guys, wanna play a trick on the mage?"

1227-"What do you mean it's to late?"

1228-a)"But aren't you my friend?"
b) "But I thought you were my friend!"

1229-"Why do you insist upon looking at my character sheet?"

1230-"I peek around the corner... but not enough to expose my whole head...
just enough for my to see with my good eye."

1231-"I don't think he had a flame thrower. Hold on, let me check."

1232-"In the name of Tyr, I command you begone foul lich!"
{said by overzealous first level cleric}

1233-"What do you mean my DEX bonus does not apply?"

1234-"Oh boy! Kudar is back!"
{Kudar is the hero of the party... or was until he met the
doppelganger!}

1235-"Don't worry, I removed all the bullets from his gun while he was
sleeping." {he reloaded it}

1236-"But it's only a little kid!"

1237-PC1: "What do you mean my sword breaks?"
PC2: "Don't worry, I have another one... now where did I put it?"

1238-"So that's what a Tarrasque looks like!"

1239-"I wonder who's holding that light over there."

1240-{party consists of 4 PCs}
PC1: "Hand me the lantern"
PC2: "I don't have it... Mark does"
PC3: "No I don't... Joe does"
PC4: "I'm not the one holding it"

1241-"Who knows how to stop a fireball?"

1242-"Why are you guys smiling like that?"

1243-"Hi. Mabye you can help me. I am looking for the thieve's guild..."

1244-"OK guys, here's the plan: In this movie I saw last week..."

1245-"Awe, he's drunk! He wouldn't know if I picked his pocket or his nose!"

1246-"Hey, I was talking to her first!"

1247-PC1: "Mike, are you Hindu?"
PC2: "No, why?"
PC3: "Because there is a red dot on your forehead!"

1248-"What do you mean my globe of invulnerability runs out?"

1249-"What do you mean my fly spell runs out?"

351250-PC1: "Shut up! Your just a silver. We wanted to talk to a GOLD
dragon, at least!"
PC2: "Umm, he doesn't look silver, guys."
PC3: "Umm, how many metals look like silver but aren't?"
PC2: "One. Plat..."

1251-"Trust me, shambling mounds hate lightning."

1252-{small green leathery creature falls from the roof and wraps itself
around PC1's face}
PC1: "Aarrgghh!"
PC2: "Quick...I think I've read about these...they're highly vulnerable
to fire!"
PC3: {carrying torch} "OKAY!" {places flaming torch against PC1's face}
PC1: "Aarrgghh!" {creature dies...PC1 suffering from wounds and burns
to the face ... PC1's hair catches fire}
PC2: "Quick...Jump in the fountain!"
{acid}

1253-PC1: "I fireball the Gnolls."
Player2: "Noooooo!"
{player2 just lost his character. His new one was to be introduced as
the prisoner of the Gnolls, but only the player and GM knew that. It
was the shortest lived character I've ever seen.}

1254-PC1: "We smell gas? Joe! Don't cast any fire spells! Now, what did I
just tell you?"
PC2: "Don't cast any fire spells."
PC1: "Good."
{5 minutes playing later}
PC2: "Goblins? I cast burning hands."

1255-"We'll leave Craig at the farmhouse so he can recover."

1256-GM: "The guard's bullets are riddling the Van."
PC: "The Briefcase! It's full of plastic explosives! I set the timer,
throw it out the window and tell Dave to floor it."
GM: "How long do you set the timer for?"
PC: "Uhh, three seconds."

1257-"Oh no, I forgot to take my parachute..."

1258-"Well, sorry, sir. Didn't meant to hit your wife..."

1259-"Is it possible to pat these beasties?"

1260-"I'm hungry.."

pa ako je dugacak briste ga,ovo je samo prvih 350
We come from the land of the ice and snow,
From the midnight sun where the hot springs blow.
The hammer of the gods will drive our ships to new lands,
To fight the horde, singing and crying: Valhalla, I am coming!
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Član
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Postovi: 488
Pridružio se: Sub Nov 03, 2007 10:31 pm
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 Re: Najvece Gluposti I Idiotizmi Igraca

Postod Draugdur u Pon Feb 11, 2008 12:34 pm

Genijalno :genije: I ja imam komad ovoga; moji omiljeni:

-(hero attacking dragon):"For Honor! For King! For God!"
Dragon:"For lunch."

-(PC se obraca ostatku druzine):"Don't worry guys, I'm completely impervious to fire. (Zmaju) Come on, you ugly, pathetic excuse for a dragon, do your worst. ... What do you mean, black dragons don't breathe fire!?"

:lol:
Here lies Firedorn, a hero in bed.
He once was alive, but now he's dead.
The last woman he bedded, turned out a man
and crying in shame, off a cliff he ran.
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Postovi: 1848
Pridružio se: Pon Maj 24, 2004 10:50 am
Lokacija: Middle Earth

 Re: Najvece Gluposti I Idiotizmi Igraca

Postod Lorkind u Pon Feb 11, 2008 4:34 pm

da izmedju ostalog :lol:
juce igaju Rolemaster moj brat i njegovi drugovi i oni su kod neke crkve gde su videli nekog Blood DEmona jel i sad tamo ima neki vrtlog od haosa to je bilo nesto ovako

GM:you stand in front of Chaos Vortex,what you do

PC:i touch it

nije umro samo se onesvestio.....do daljnjeg
We come from the land of the ice and snow,
From the midnight sun where the hot springs blow.
The hammer of the gods will drive our ships to new lands,
To fight the horde, singing and crying: Valhalla, I am coming!
Korisnikov avatar
Član
Član
 
Postovi: 488
Pridružio se: Sub Nov 03, 2007 10:31 pm
Lokacija: Vrbas

 Re: Najvece Gluposti I Idiotizmi Igraca

Postod Elrik Zvani Might u Pet Maj 09, 2008 5:54 am

Velika borba na obali reke je vec bila daleko odmakla i polako se privodila kraju,party i ja smo trosili poslednje atome konstitucije da pobijemo sto vise razjareno razbezanih orkova,jedan od njih mi je bas bio na duzini kratkog maca,i taman da zamahnem i rascopam mu lobanju,iz vedra neba udari grom u njegov metalni slem i ubi obojicu.


Sve bi bilo ok,samo da Martin nije vodio igru i objasnio mi kako je to moguce i kako je to zapisano negde u pravilima(koja je verovatno sam smislio za ovaj session dok je citao players handbook na wc solji) ::T:: ::D2::
run rabbit run, dig that hole,forget the Sun; and when at last the work is done, don't sit down, it's time to dig another one...

i know jah love it is superior
your devil complex inferior oh yes
worshipping material
bowing to your silver and gold
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Član
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Postovi: 134
Pridružio se: Čet Maj 01, 2008 11:39 am
Lokacija: Medja kod Milutinove njive

 Re: Najvece Gluposti I Idiotizmi Igraca

Postod Elrik Zvani Might u Pet Maj 09, 2008 9:18 am

-Kisa je svakog trenutka pocinjala da pada
-Vrata dropshipa se otvaraju kad hoces sa dna patosa
-Strele u tvom tobolcu su prestale da postoje
-Ako nastavis da deljes to drvo istupices taj krs od maca
-Patuljak?! zabodi glavu u taj tanjir i zamisli da imas helm of delusion....e tako, sad cuti ja pricam sa paladinom!!!
-Slika na zidu je nepomicna konstantno,to je ono sto si zakljucio nakon 2 sata gledanja u istu
-Starica vas je pogledala mrko i nabacila jebacki smesak
-Jer mogu ja da imam malog privatnog fighter-a za licne potrebe muckanja potion-a?
::T:: ::T:: ::T:: ::T:: ::T:: ::T:: ::T:: ::T:: ::T:: ::T:: ::T:: ::T:: ::T:: ::T::
run rabbit run, dig that hole,forget the Sun; and when at last the work is done, don't sit down, it's time to dig another one...

i know jah love it is superior
your devil complex inferior oh yes
worshipping material
bowing to your silver and gold
Korisnikov avatar
Član
Član
 
Postovi: 134
Pridružio se: Čet Maj 01, 2008 11:39 am
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 Re: Najvece Gluposti I Idiotizmi Igraca

Postod Return of the Fallen u Sub Maj 10, 2008 1:14 pm

Meni je ipak najbolje kada DM kaže:"Vidiš ti da ne čuješ ništa."

Poslednje reči dvojice iskusnih igrača druge edicije:
-Ja imam tri napada a ti dva...ima da olešimo onog zmaja...
-Pa,da...uostalom,to je neki stari zmaj;verovatno više i ne može da se kreće...
"You've killed us Claudio you fucking kraut!"
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Postovi: 1075
Pridružio se: Pet Feb 24, 2006 3:30 am
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 Re: Najvece Gluposti I Idiotizmi Igraca

Postod Elrik Zvani Might u Sub Maj 17, 2008 9:45 am

Tucky(DM);Imas tu neku rupu u zemlji
Ja(thief);Ok! ulazim,tj.upuzavam unutra
Tucky(DM);mracno je
Ja(thief);nema veze idem dublje
Tucky(DM);puzao si tako jos 20m i cujes da ti nesto dolazi u susret velikom brzinom
Ja(thief);vadim dagger i cekam u gardu
Tucky(DM);posle par sekunde vidis njusku i dva oka,da to je jazavac!
Ja(thief);napadam ja njega,daggerom u oko
Tucky(DM);ok! baci d20
kocka se rola po stolu,od mogucih 20 sansi ja ubodem ebenih 1!!!!
Ja(thief);Fumbble!!! pa sta sad da radim
Tucky(DM);jer imas kod sebe nesto ljuto?
Ja(thief);imam,jer mogu nesto sa tim?
Tucky(DM);Mozes!!
Ja(thief);STA??
Tucky(DM);Namazi se sa tim,ovaj jazavac voli ljutu klopu
run rabbit run, dig that hole,forget the Sun; and when at last the work is done, don't sit down, it's time to dig another one...

i know jah love it is superior
your devil complex inferior oh yes
worshipping material
bowing to your silver and gold
Korisnikov avatar
Član
Član
 
Postovi: 134
Pridružio se: Čet Maj 01, 2008 11:39 am
Lokacija: Medja kod Milutinove njive

 Re: Najvece Gluposti I Idiotizmi Igraca

Postod Return of the Fallen u Sub Maj 17, 2008 2:42 pm

DM: Ušli ste u kolibu,vidite da je asketski uređena;goli zidovi i patos,prostirka preko slame sa nekim smrdljivim prekrivačem i sto na sred sobe na kome se nalaze neka sranja...šta radite?

Igrači: Ok...šta sve ima na stolu?

DM: ...otkud znam,bre,neka sranja,jebote!
"You've killed us Claudio you fucking kraut!"
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 Re: Najvece Gluposti I Idiotizmi Igraca

Postod Aqarius u Sub Maj 17, 2008 4:58 pm

Ne osvrci se, mrmoti te sustizu!
Slika
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 Re: Najvece Gluposti I Idiotizmi Igraca

Postod Lorkind u Ned Maj 25, 2008 9:53 pm

stvarno odvale ::T::
We come from the land of the ice and snow,
From the midnight sun where the hot springs blow.
The hammer of the gods will drive our ships to new lands,
To fight the horde, singing and crying: Valhalla, I am coming!
Korisnikov avatar
Član
Član
 
Postovi: 488
Pridružio se: Sub Nov 03, 2007 10:31 pm
Lokacija: Vrbas

 Re: Najvece Gluposti I Idiotizmi Igraca

Postod Return of the Fallen u Sub Maj 31, 2008 10:16 pm

"You've killed us Claudio you fucking kraut!"
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 Re: Najvece Gluposti I Idiotizmi Igraca

Postod Slipi u Pon Jul 07, 2008 10:51 am

da pre par godina moj drug fighter je u nekom delu price kad nije imao oklop a bio vec na nekom 10-lvl trazio BOJLER da napravi oklot sebi tj da se ugura u njega i tako bori
Zanimljivo je to sto mu je dm pola sata objasnjavao kako nemoze da se bori dok je umotan u bojler....
Nama nekoliko nikako nije bilo jasno sta se budale prepiru kad logicno-KAKO BOJLER MOZE DA POSTOJI-upisali smo se od smeha-ok bio je nov u dnd-u,ali dm je tad igrao vec godinama :mrgreen:
Član
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 Re: Najvece Gluposti I Idiotizmi Igraca

Postod Abezila u Sre Jul 30, 2008 12:23 pm

O boze ne mogu da verujem da je ova tema jos ovde...
Član
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 Re: Najvece Gluposti I Idiotizmi Igraca

Postod Return of the Fallen u Sre Jul 30, 2008 2:23 pm

S'obzirom na neke druge stvari koje su JOŠ UVEK ovde,ova tema je smešna.
"You've killed us Claudio you fucking kraut!"
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